Episode
IFS Therapy for Gay and Queer Men with Max Littman
- Published
- Nov 18, 2025
- Duration seconds
- 1910
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Summary
In this episode, I talk with Max Littman , an IFS therapist, consultant, and writer. Max's new book, Internal Family Systems Therapy for Gay and Queer Men: A Companion for After Coming Out , launched the morning we recorded this conversation. His work centers on attachment, attunement, cultural burdens, and the relational impact of trauma — especially for gay and queer men who are still healing the parts shaped by growing up without safety, guidance, or representation. We talk about why this book matters, the parts that continue to carry burden even after coming out, and the places where Queer identity, family dynamics, and IFS meet. "Unburdening offers an opportunity to reclaim a personal embodied sense of spirituality, one that honors our inherent worth and belonging." Max shares his own story of growing up without language for his identity, the isolation he felt as a teen, and how those experiences shaped his clinical work. He describes a part he calls "teen without guidance," and the insight that came from recognizing how much that part still needed care. Together, we explore: What coming out doesn't automatically heal The "teen without guidance" part and why it matters How cultural, religious, and family burdens live in the system The longing for belonging and its impact on relationships How IFS helps gay and queer men reclaim sexuality, connection, and choice The role of community, experimentation, and attunement in healing The challenge of navigating adulthood with fewer developmental and relational experiences than many same-aged peers received Be sure to check out Max's blog that I keep hearing so much about. And don't miss my extended interview with Max over on Substack for paid subscribers. About Max Littman Max Littman is an IFS therapist, consultant, and w…