Episode
Why You Pour a Drink Before Hard Conversations — And How to Stop With Anna Lecat
- Podcast
- Sisters In Sobriety
- Published
- Mar 30, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 2735
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Summary
<p>Conflict avoidance and people-pleasing show up in so many women's stories around alcohol — yet they rarely get the airtime they deserve. In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen sit down with Anna Lecat, intimacy and conflict consultant, global speaker, and author of <em>Loving Conflict: Creating Collaboration Where Others See Division</em>. Anna has spent decades across cultures, continents, and boardrooms persuading people that learning to conflict well is one of the most loving things we can offer each other.</p><br><p>What does it actually mean to fight kindly? Why do so many women reach for a drink before a hard conversation — or avoid it entirely? And what is it about anger that feels so unbearable to sit with?</p><br><p>Anna unpacks the tango metaphor at the heart of her work — conflict as tension plus connection, not threat plus danger. She walks through a practical spectrum for building conflict confidence, starting with low-stakes settings like restaurants and working up to the relationships that flood us most. The conversation explores emotional responsibility, nervous system regulation, and how early experiences with anger shape us as adults — often leading us to read conflict as rejection when it's really someone else's old wound surfacing.</p><br><p>Then things get personal. Sonia opens up about pouring a glass of wine before calling her mother — and how that glass became a bottle. Kathleen shares her own story of returning to her hairdresser with honest, gentle feedback and what that small act revealed about the difference between avoiding conflict and moving through it with care.</p><br><p>This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that…