Episode

How to Accept What You Cannot Change: Anxious Times, Part 3 (#389)

Podcast
Religion on the Mind
Published
Mar 26, 2026
Duration seconds
1926
Processing state
not_requested
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JSON
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Markdown
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Summary

I'm joined by my co-host Kristen Tideman for the third installment of the Anxious Times series. We dig into Emmy van Dersen's concept of "the necessary" — the hard limits baked into existence that we can't change, only accept — and explore how resisting these limits is one of the biggest drivers of unhealthy anxiety, whether you're navigating religious deconstruction, a new diagnosis, or just being alive in a chaotic world. In the Patron-only second half, Kristen shares the raw, emotional story of her MS diagnosis as a lived case study in running headfirst into hard limits, and we explore what it looks like to resist or deny the necessary — from anti-aging culture to political utopianism to religious change. Highlights: Defining "the necessary" (hard limits) Mortality, uncertainty, embodiment as givens Kristen's MS diagnosis and processing Religious change and false certainty Acceptance ≠ approval or minimizing Anxious Times Episode Part 1⁠ ⁠Anxious Times Episode Part 2 ___________________________________________ Follow Dan on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/dancoke/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Or Twitter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠twitter.com/DanKoch⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Faith deconstruction resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.soyouredeconstructing.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠patreon.com/dankoch⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ YHP Patron-only FB group: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.dankochwords.com/yhp.html⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join Dan's email list: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.dankochwords.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Artwork by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Nickryanluevano.com⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices