Episode
Masking, Over-Functioning and the Shame That Keeps You Stuck
- Podcast
- You Are Not A Frog
- Published
- Jun 15, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 4105
- Processing state
not_requested- Canonical source
- http://youarenotafrog.com/325
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Summary
If you've always felt like everyone else got an unwritten handbook about how to behave at work - and you've had to figure it out yourself, one interaction at a time - this episode is for you. This week, Rachel’s in conversation with Kirstie Pickles: vet, autistic ADHD professional, and EDI advocate. Kirstie was diagnosed as an adult - after years of masking in a high-stakes clinical role, performing competence while running on empty underneath. We talk about: What masking really costs - not just after one hard day, but across a career Neurodivergent burnout: why it is different from regular burnout, and why the usual advice doesn't work The shame of late diagnosis - and what it means to finally have a name for it What colleagues and leaders can do to make workplaces work for everyone You don't need a diagnosis to recognise yourself here. A lot of us in high-achieving, high-pressure roles have neurodivergent traits we have never had a name for. We just learned to mask through it. Our ingrained programming tells us to keep performing, keep adapting, keep looking like we're coping fine. But that performance has a cost - and it will affect your next decision, and the one after that. Different is not defective. 🎙️ Listen to the full podcast: http://youarenotafrog.com/episodes/324 📩 Join 20,000 professionals: https://youarenotafrog.com/welcome/ 🐸 Get more episodes and resources by joining FrogXtra Mentioned in this episode: 🌞 [FREE DOWNLOAD] Summer Recharge Checklist for Doctors 🟦 Permission to Thrive