Episode
28: 5 Things I Realized After 18 Years of Co-Parenting
- Podcast
- The Ugly Truth of Divorce
- Published
- May 12, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 2029
- Processing state
not_requested- Canonical source
- https://audioboom.com/posts/8902349
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Summary
Listen. If you're in custody hell right now, this episode is either gonna piss you off or save your life. Probably both. I spent 18 years in high-conflict co-parenting. $100K+ in legal fees. 300+ court dates. And I'm here to tell you the shit nobody wants to hear. Your parenting plan sucks and you know it. Yeah, your attorney told you it's fine. They lied. A vague parenting plan costs you money, time, and your sanity for a decade. Get it detailed from the start or you're gonna be back in court every time something happens. You have zero control over the other parent. Spend the next 10 years trying to fix them and see where it gets you. Spoiler: nowhere. I tried to control everything. Couldn't control shit. The only power you have is your response, your boundaries, and your documentation. That's it. Your kids see everything. The tension. The fear. The trying. The inconsistencies. They're not blind. They're clocking who shows up and who doesn't. Who loves them unconditionally and who makes them perform for it. And they remember. All of it. You only get 18 years. Don't waste them. I lost the first 10 years to court battles. Dysregulated. Scared. Not present. I can't get those back. You get 18 summers, 18 holidays, 18 winters with your kids as kids. That's your whole shot. Don't blow it trying to win something that doesn't matter. The hard truth is your co-parent is probably not gonna change. You can't control them. Stop trying. What you can do is show up for your kids, get your nervous system regulated, and stop feeding the negativity machine. If you're just starting this journey, take notes. If you're 10 years deep, grieve what you've lost and pivot now. It's not too late. My kids were teenagers when I finally woke up, and we still had time to repair things. You know bet…