Episode
Your Kids Aren't Trying to Give You a Hard Time (They're Having a Hard Time) featuring Jon Fogel
- Podcast
- The Dad Edge Podcast
- Published
- Apr 3, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 5643
- Processing state
not_requested- Canonical source
- https://thedadedge.com/1460
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Summary
In this episode, I sit down with Jon Fogel — pastor, dad of four, PhD candidate in developmental psychology, and bestselling author of Punishment Free Parenting. Jon is one of those rare guys who can make you laugh so hard you forget you're learning some of the most important parenting insights you've ever heard. We open with chaos — including the time his wife went into labor at Goodwill, insisted on finishing the bathroom tile and installing a toilet before going to the hospital, and the time Jon almost missed the birth of his fourth child because he stopped for Jimmy John's on the way back. But then it gets real. Jon breaks down why punishment doesn't work — not as a philosophy, but as brain science. When you punish a child, you activate the threat response system, which is the exact part of the brain that shuts off learning. We dig into what to do instead, the landmark Bobo doll experiment proving kids follow the behavior of the men in their lives above everyone else, and how rupture and repair actually builds stronger relationships than if you'd never messed up at all. Jon also walks us through Set My Feelings Free — his kids' book packed with emotional regulation games you can start using today to stop tantrums before they start. Timeline Summary [0:00] Introduction to the Dad Edge mission [1:02] Introducing Jon Fogel — pastor, author, PhD candidate, and Whole Parent [6:07] Why the parenting space desperately needs more men in it [14:02] Jon's family — and the birth stories that will make you lose it [26:12] Why Jon goes calm in a crisis but loses it over spilled milk [45:34] The core message of Punishment Free Parenting — brain science, not philosophy [49:12] Kids don't have the same negativity bias as adults — they want to see you in the best light [50:18] Your…