Episode
Purity Culture Recovery: Shame, Deconstruction, and Autistic Masking (w/ Erica Smith)
- Published
- Mar 3, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 1870
- Processing state
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Summary
Purity culture. High control religion. Autistic masking. In this episode, Brett (The AuDHD Boss) gets vulnerable about growing up in a fundamentalist evangelical environment—and how rigid rules and shame can stay in your body long after you’ve “left.” Brett is late-diagnosed Autistic + ADHD, and in this conversation with author and educator Erica Smith , they explore why purity culture can feel especially “sticky” when you’re used to rule-following, people-pleasing, and masking for safety. Erica is the author of The Purity Culture Recovery Guide: The Shame-Free Sex Education You Deserve and founder of the Purity Culture Dropout Program —inclusive, trauma-informed education many of us never received. In this episode we talk about: What purity culture is (and how it became a movement) How shame and fear shape relationships and identity Why rigid rules can feel “safe”—and how to replace them with your values What “deconstruction” means and how it can support healing “Is it too late?” (No. Ever.) Late coming-out, “second adolescence,” and reclaiming your timeline How to talk to partners about your background without apologizing for it Links & resources: Erica Smith’s book (affiliate): https://bookshop.org/a/108800/9798881801304 Purity Culture Dropout Program: https://www.ericasmitheac.com/the-purity-culture-dropout-program More from AuDHD Boss: AuDHDboss.com (For education and lived experience—not medical advice.) 00:00 Purity culture, high control religion & autistic masking 00:56 Leaving the church, carrying shame + rigid rules 01:47 Meet Erica Smith + The Purity Culture Recovery Guide 02:47 What purity culture is (broad + specific) 04:15 Why it took hold in the 90s (True Love Waits) 05:46 Reading recovery work when it feels activating 07:42 Skip to the chapters…