Episode

No, I Won't Be Your Bridesmaid

Podcast: Modern Love
Published: Apr 22, 2026
Duration seconds: 3090
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Canonical source: https://www.nytimes.com/column/modern-love-podcast
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Summary

Ruhama Wolle loves weddings, but after being a bridesmaid three times in a little more than a year, she reached a breaking point. The financial and emotional burden was too much, and in an article for Glamour magazine, she publicly resigned from ever being a bridesmaid again. Now, Wolle has written “I Hope You Elope: A Bridesmaid Survival Guide,” with practical tips on how to navigate the ask with authenticity, honesty and boundaries. In this episode of “Modern Love,” Wolle tells host Anna Martin about the bridesmaid dynamics that made her call it quits. Plus, she gives advice and scripts for those looking to approach the role in a new way.