Episode
Why You Stopped Wanting Sex (And What To Do About It) ft. Dr. Lori Brotto
- Published
- Sep 18, 2026
- Duration seconds
- 3021
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Summary
A lot of women notice their desire for sex fading over time and assume something is wrong with them, but there's often a real reason for it, and they're not the only ones going through it. I sat down with Dr. Lori Brotto, one of the most recognized researchers in women's sexual health, to talk about why desire changes and what actually helps bring it back. We discuss the difference between spontaneous and responsive desire, how to tell low desire apart from asexuality, and how sensate focus works in sex therapy. Lori also introduces eSense, her mindfulness and CBT based digital platform built to close the access gap for women who can't reach a sex therapist, and shares surprising research on how an AI-powered navigator stacks up against a human one. What You'll Learn How to differentiate low desire (a treatable concern) from asexuality (a sexual orientation). What sensate focus actually is and how it's used in sex therapy. Why sexless relationships often start with avoiding non-sexual touch, not sex itself. What mindfulness and CBT do as treatments for low desire. The origin and design of eSense: a self-directed digital program modeled on real sex therapy sessions. The risks of unregulated AI (like general chatbots) in mental health contexts, and how eSense was trained differently. Access, translation, and the biopsychosocial barriers facing racialized and non-English-speaking women. Technoference: how technology disconnects us in daily life, and how it can also be used to rebuild presence. A live guided mindfulness exercise listeners can follow along with. Get in Touch with Lori: Website eSense website Instagram Get in Touch with Me: Website Instagram Youtube Substack Preorder my book