{"podcast":{"title":"You've Got to Be Critting Me","slug":"you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757","podcast_index_feed_id":7039757,"rss_url":"https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/6703582a6f369dd035926f30","website_url":"https://shows.acast.com/youve-got-to-be-critting-me","image_url":"https://assets.pippa.io/shows/6703582a6f369dd035926f30/1745905127652-32a05e29-941b-4e9b-b4b2-fb142b7c1236.jpeg","author":"Travis Stewart","episode_count":49,"summary":"You've Got to Be Critting Me is a story-driven Dungeons & Dragons actual-play podcast following a chaotic band of adventurers; Malcius the flamboyant tiefling bard, Sefi the towering goliath fighter, Thormir the mischievous dwarven druid, and Todd the masked half-elf rogue; guided by their long-suffering Dungeon Master, Jeff. Blending comedy, heartfelt roleplay, and cinematic storytelling, the party stumbles through bandits, beans, mysteries, and magical disasters as they try (and often fail) to become heroes. If you love character-focused adventures, unpredictable dice rolls, and a party that thrives on questionable decisions, this is the show for you. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.","last_synced_at":"2026-07-13T10:21:31.284693+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757"},"episode":{"title":"Episode 34: They Wanted Us to Win","slug":"episode-34-they-wanted-us-to-win","published_at":"2026-01-12T06:00:00+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757/episode-34-they-wanted-us-to-win","show_page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757","url":"https://shows.acast.com/youve-got-to-be-critting-me/episodes/episode-34-they-wanted-us-to-win","audio_url":"https://sphinx.acast.com/p/open/s/6703582a6f369dd035926f30/e/696473003a409cca499b2cd4/media.mp3","summary":"The Winter Lunar Festival continues, but the longer the party stays, the harder it becomes to ignore that something is deeply wrong. As night falls without warning, the music stops and a makeshift arena is revealed at the heart of the celebration. What begins as harmless festival entertainment quickly turns personal when Sefi signs up to fight under a false name, and Todd follows suit with an alias of his own. With betting encouraged, rules vaguely defined, and magic strictly forbidden, the party places their wagers and prepares to watch, or participate in, the spectacle. Inside the arena, Sefi dominates the competition with raw strength and calculated technique, while Todd fights his way through the brackets with speed, precision, and just a little chaos. All the while, familiar faces fill the crowd: parents long thought dead, figures from the past smiling and cheering as if nothing ever went wrong. But not everyone sees the same thing. Todd notices faces that blur, glitch, and briefly reveal something watching from beneath the illusion. As victories pile up and attention turns toward the final rounds, the celebration grows louder, the crowd grows closer, and the deception grows thinner. Whatever this place is, it wants the party fully invested before it makes its next move. The fights are far from over, and neither is the lie. DM: Jeffery Jordan Malcius: Travis Stewart Sefi: Morgan Gibson Thormir: Nick Miller Todd: Bryce Shearer Podcast art by Ada Hath Theme song \"Royal Joust\" by Bardcore. Follow them on YouTube , Spotify , and Apple Music Additional DM elements by Loresmyth Join our Patreon! Buy our merch on our website ! Follow us on Instagram , Facebook , and Threads Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.","meta_description":"The Winter Lunar Festival continues, but the longer the party stays, the harder it becomes to ignore that something is deeply wrong. As night falls withou…","key_points":[],"chapters":[],"topics":[],"duration_seconds":3877,"processing_state":"not_requested","actions":[{"name":"request_transcript","method":"POST","url":"https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757/episodes/episode-34-they-wanted-us-to-win/transcription-requests","description":"Idempotently request low-priority transcript generation for this episode."},{"name":"read_markdown","method":"GET","url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-ve-got-to-be-critting-me-7039757/episode-34-they-wanted-us-to-win.md","description":"Read the agent-friendly Markdown representation of this episode resource."}]}}