{"podcast":{"title":"You Must Be Some Kind of Therapist","slug":"you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473","podcast_index_feed_id":5142473,"rss_url":"https://feeds.transistor.fm/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist","website_url":"https://www.sometherapist.com","image_url":"https://img.transistorcdn.com/kKSwO8C4wLrjRyUIWjlyIr2zfV-lqxogMZ4PRqp_ams/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:1400/h:1400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS9zaG93/LzI1NzQ0LzE2NDQy/NzA3NjktYXJ0d29y/ay5qcGc.jpg","author":"Stephanie Winn","episode_count":221,"summary":"A podcast at the intersection of psychology and culture that intimately explores the human experience and critiques the counseling profession. Your host, Stephanie Winn, distills wisdom gained from her practice as a family therapist and coach while pivoting towards questions of how to apply a practical understanding of psychology to the novel dilemmas of the 21st century, from political polarization to medical malpractice. What does ethical mental health care look like in a normless age, as our moral compasses spin in search of true north? How can therapists treat patients under pressure to affirm everything from the notion of \"gender identity\" to assisted suicide? Primarily a long-form interview podcast, Stephanie invites unorthodox, free-thinking guests from many walks of life, including counselors, social workers, medical professionals, writers, researchers, and people with unique lived experience, such as detransitioners. Curious about many things, Stephanie’s interdisciplinary psychological lens investigates challenging social issues and inspires transformation in the self, relationships, and society. She is known for bringing calm warmth to painful subjects, and astute perce…","last_synced_at":"2026-07-20T16:18:10.386697+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473"},"episode":{"title":"217. \"Gender Identity\" as a Shell: What the Alter Ego Does for Your Child & How to Help Them Desist","slug":"217-gender-identity-as-a-shell-what-the-alter-ego-does-for-your-child-how-to-help-them-desist","published_at":"2026-06-08T08:00:00+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473/217-gender-identity-as-a-shell-what-the-alter-ego-does-for-your-child-how-to-help-them-desist","show_page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473","url":"https://share.transistor.fm/s/3be950d8","audio_url":"https://pdcn.co/e/media.transistor.fm/3be950d8/ec88d8ec.mp3","summary":"In this solo episode, I share one of my favorite metaphors for understanding how desistance actually unfolds in practice — because it rarely looks the way most parents hope it will. Many parents carry a fantasy version of desistance in their heads: a tearful moment of confession, an apology, a sudden reversal. That's almost never what happens. What actually happens is slower, messier, and far less dramatic — but still hopeful, if you know what you're looking at. The metaphor I use is the hermit crab. When a hermit crab outgrows its shell, it must find a new one before abandoning the old one. That terrifying moment of exposure between shells is something the crab instinctively avoids. For your trans-identified child, the alter ego identity is that old shell — it provides psychological structure and protection, answers the question \"who am I?\", and is doing real work for them even when it's causing harm. Desistance doesn't happen until a new shell exists to replace it. I walk parents through what those building blocks actually look like — moments of femininity, embodiment, taste, competence, nurturance, and authentic connection — and why it's so important not to connect those signs directly to gender. The way you respond to those building blocks either reinforces them or demolishes them. I also expand the definition of identity-building beyond gender expression to include real-world skills, relationships, experiences, and sources of self-esteem. The goal isn't just for the old shell to fall away — it's for your child to become someone who doesn't need a label to answer the question of who they are. This episode doubles as a bonus lesson in ROGD Repair . Where it can be found in the course, it also comes with a companion essay based on the transcript, a summary of key poi…","meta_description":"In this solo episode, I share one of my favorite metaphors for understanding how desistance actually unfolds in practice — because it rarely looks the way…","key_points":[],"chapters":[],"topics":[],"duration_seconds":848,"processing_state":"not_requested","actions":[{"name":"request_transcript","method":"POST","url":"https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473/episodes/217-gender-identity-as-a-shell-what-the-alter-ego-does-for-your-child-how-to-help-them-desist/transcription-requests","description":"Idempotently request low-priority transcript generation for this episode."},{"name":"read_markdown","method":"GET","url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist-5142473/217-gender-identity-as-a-shell-what-the-alter-ego-does-for-your-child-how-to-help-them-desist.md","description":"Read the agent-friendly Markdown representation of this episode resource."}]}}