{"podcast":{"title":"The Jayson Gaddis Podcast","slug":"the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455","podcast_index_feed_id":745455,"rss_url":"https://anchor.fm/s/1034ef008/podcast/rss","website_url":"https://relationshipschool.com","image_url":"https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/staging/podcast_uploaded_nologo/43404722/43404722-1772479501929-d6f3bd4f93209.jpg","author":"Jayson Gaddis","episode_count":562,"summary":"The Jayson Gaddis Podcast explores marriage, fatherhood, spirituality, and emotional and relational leadership. Hosted by Founder, high performance coach, and author Jayson Gaddis, who has spent 20+ years helping people transform their most important relationships.","last_synced_at":"2026-07-29T22:19:49.346921+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455"},"episode":{"title":"Why Us Men Get So Defensive & What to Do About It - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 564","slug":"why-us-men-get-so-defensive-what-to-do-about-it-jayson-gaddis-ellen-boeder-564","published_at":"2026-07-29T11:00:00+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455/why-us-men-get-so-defensive-what-to-do-about-it-jayson-gaddis-ellen-boeder-564","show_page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455","url":"https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/jaysongaddis/episodes/Why-Us-Men-Get-So-Defensive--What-to-Do-About-It---Jayson-Gaddis--Ellen-Boeder---564-e3mm98q","audio_url":"https://anchor.fm/s/1034ef008/podcast/play/123462362/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2026-6-29%2F428808243-44100-2-34d0bcc354914.mp3","summary":"Why do so many men get defensive? Jayson and Ellen explore where defensiveness comes from, the impact it has on relationships, and why it gets in the way of real connection. They share practical ways to interrupt defensive patterns, how to stay with your partner's feelings instead of protecting yourself, and what it looks like to take responsibility when you get it wrong. Jayson also shares what led him to dedicate his work to helping men and boys grow. If you want to become less defensive and more available in your relationships, this episode is for you. Timestamps: 4:30 - examples of defensiveness 9:30 - the relational cost of getting defensive 19:30 - how to address defensive patterns 28:00 - how to attend to your partner's feelings instead of being defensive 36:18 - what got Jayson interested in working with men and boys 49:36 - how to take responsibility for defensiveness 1:02:00 - increasing your capacity for growth Links: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Relationship School⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Jayson on social media: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Twitter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠","meta_description":"Why do so many men get defensive? Jayson and Ellen explore where defensiveness comes from, the impact it has on relationships, and why it gets in the way…","key_points":[],"chapters":[],"topics":[],"duration_seconds":3995,"processing_state":"not_requested","actions":[{"name":"request_transcript","method":"POST","url":"https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455/episodes/why-us-men-get-so-defensive-what-to-do-about-it-jayson-gaddis-ellen-boeder-564/transcription-requests","description":"Idempotently request low-priority transcript generation for this episode."},{"name":"read_markdown","method":"GET","url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-jayson-gaddis-podcast-745455/why-us-men-get-so-defensive-what-to-do-about-it-jayson-gaddis-ellen-boeder-564.md","description":"Read the agent-friendly Markdown representation of this episode resource."}]}}