{"podcast":{"title":"40 Plus: Gay Men. Gay Talk.","slug":"40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616","podcast_index_feed_id":912616,"rss_url":"https://feeds.captivate.fm/fortyplus/","website_url":"https://rickclemons.com","image_url":"https://artwork.captivate.fm/4ad7a7a6-b0f8-4cca-8d2b-3dd33fbcedc3/P6JHFhYg6teBJviuvlKAJHwo.jpg","author":"Rick Clemons","episode_count":300,"summary":"Welcome to the only podcast exploring the messiness, awesomeness, of masculinity of being a gay man over 40. Each episode is about sparking idea, addressing challenges, and diving deep into what it looks like to be a vulnerable gay guy. We talk about the stuff us gay guys have a hard time talking about, man-to-man: masculinity, sex, careers, our bodies, parenting, sexuality, failures, success, and aging, relationships, coming out - nothing is off limits. 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk is the revamped version of 40 Plus: Real Men. Real Talk podcast and is a short format podcast that's easy to digest. We take deep dives - one topic at a time - digging up the truth of what it’s like to be a gay man, instead of some contrived expectation of masculinity. We’re reclaiming manhood and our masculinity by facing our fears, making bold moves, and living life without apologies. Join us, but you've got to drop your BS, forget posturing, and be ready to explore the comical dysfunctions of our lives as gay men 40+ years of age!","last_synced_at":null,"page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616"},"episode":{"title":"Lonely, Sober, and Still Searching: How Gay Men Build Real Connection Without Losing Themselves – Christopher Tompkins","slug":"lonely-sober-and-still-searching-how-gay-men-build-real-connection-without-losing-themselves-christopher-tompkins","published_at":"2026-01-02T10:30:00+00:00","page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616/lonely-sober-and-still-searching-how-gay-men-build-real-connection-without-losing-themselves-christopher-tompkins","show_page_url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616","url":"https://rickclemons.com/40-gay-men-gay-talk/362-christopher-tompkins","audio_url":"https://episodes.captivate.fm/episode/3b5ac689-9857-445b-be82-8d5433f53e73.mp3","summary":"Loneliness is one of the most unspoken struggles among gay men, especially as we age, get sober, or outgrow old social circles. In this powerful conversation, licensed therapist Chris Tompkins unpacks why so many gay men feel disconnected even when surrounded by people, apps, and nightlife. This episode explores how sobriety, shame, dating apps, and societal expectations quietly fuel isolation, and what it actually takes to build authentic connection. From the “wounded healer” journey to embracing singleness, self-acceptance, and values-based living, this episode invites gay men to stop chasing validation and start creating lives rooted in truth, alignment, and meaningful connection. Three Key Takeaways Loneliness isn’t a personal failure, it’s often a byproduct of disconnection from self. Sobriety can reveal who and what is genuinely aligned in your life. Real connection begins when your values, actions, and identity are congruent. About Christopher Chris Tompkins is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who specializes in working with adult gay men. He is also the author of the award-winning book Raising LGBTQ Allies: A Parent’s Guide to Changing the Messages from the Playground. In addition to being a therapist, Chris is a writer and public speaker. His work has been featured on TEDx, NBC, HuffPost, Psychology Today, The Advocate, and more. Connect With Christopher Website Instagram LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Commu…","meta_description":"Loneliness is one of the most unspoken struggles among gay men, especially as we age, get sober, or outgrow old social circles. In this powerful conversat…","key_points":[],"chapters":[],"topics":[],"duration_seconds":2469,"processing_state":"not_requested","actions":[{"name":"request_transcript","method":"POST","url":"https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616/episodes/lonely-sober-and-still-searching-how-gay-men-build-real-connection-without-losing-themselves-christopher-tompkins/transcription-requests","description":"Idempotently request low-priority transcript generation for this episode."},{"name":"read_markdown","method":"GET","url":"https://stenobird.com/podcast/40-plus-gay-men-gay-talk-912616/lonely-sober-and-still-searching-how-gay-men-build-real-connection-without-losing-themselves-christopher-tompkins.md","description":"Read the agent-friendly Markdown representation of this episode resource."}]}}