# How to Talk to Anyone: Lessons from a Michelin Star Chef Who Does It 100 Times a Day | PJ Calapa

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/well-said-7809213/how-to-talk-to-anyone-lessons-from-a-michelin-star-chef-who-does-it-100-times-a-day-pj-calapa
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/well-said-7809213/how-to-talk-to-anyone-lessons-from-a-michelin-star-chef-who-does-it-100-times-a-day-pj-calapa.md
Podcast: [Well Said](https://stenobird.com/podcast/well-said-7809213)
Published: 2026-04-28T21:00:01+00:00
Episode link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/well-said-podcast4/episodes/How-to-Talk-to-Anyone-Lessons-from-a-Michelin-Star-Chef-Who-Does-It-100-Times-a-Day--PJ-Calapa-e3ijou3
Audio file: https://anchor.fm/s/1110056d8/podcast/play/119185795/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2026-3-28%2F423057691-44100-2-9a22cd252b7ff.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/well-said-7809213/episodes/how-to-talk-to-anyone-lessons-from-a-michelin-star-chef-who-does-it-100-times-a-day-pj-calapa
Duration seconds: 2756

## Resource

PJ Calapa is the Brand Executive Chef of Marea, one of the most celebrated Italian seafood restaurants in American fine dining, with locations in New York, Beverly Hills, and Aspen. He got there through twenty years in New York's most demanding kitchens, including Bouley, Eleven Madison Park, and Nobu 57, a Michelin star and three NYT stars at Ai Fiori, two restaurants of his own, and one he lost during the pandemic. He came back. Marea's regulars include the Obamas, Beyoncé, and Lady Gaga. Anthony Bourdain called the pasta the best he'd ever tasted. PJ's entire career has been built in environments where communication isn't something you prepare. It's a reflex you build. That's why he's on Well Said. And: Pia has known him since high school in Brownsville. In fact, he was her prom date. In this episode: - The week at Bouley that became the foundation of his entire leadership philosophy - Why giving his team ownership of a dish produces higher standards than demanding them - How he keeps a team calm during the most chaotic service, even when he knows it's rough - His system for reading any table or entering any difficult conversation - What a Fortune 500 CEO would learn in one week of kitchen service - Why growing up bilingual on the Texas-Mexico border gave him a communication edge he still uses every day Subscribe to Well Said on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 — Growing up in Brownsville 08:00 — Landing at Bouley 13:00 — The week that almost broke him 17:00 — The conversation that changed how he leads 27:00 — Ai Fiori and earning the Michelin star 36:00 — Losing Scampi: "I'm a free agent, not a failure" 44:00 — Why lifting your team is the only leadership that works 52:00 — How a Michelin star chef reads…

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