# 191: Why You Keep Falling For Their Potential Instead Of Who They Are

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-sabrina-zohar-show-5994471/191-why-you-keep-falling-for-their-potential-instead-of-who-they-are
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-sabrina-zohar-show-5994471/191-why-you-keep-falling-for-their-potential-instead-of-who-they-are.md
Podcast: [The Sabrina Zohar Show](https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-sabrina-zohar-show-5994471)
Published: 2026-03-06T08:01:00+00:00
Episode link: https://pdst.fm/e/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/NSR9703069462.mp3?updated=1777046497
Audio file: https://pdst.fm/e/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/NSR9703069462.mp3?updated=1777046497
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/the-sabrina-zohar-show-5994471/episodes/191-why-you-keep-falling-for-their-potential-instead-of-who-they-are
Duration seconds: 2353

## Resource

Ever caught yourself saying "when it's good, it's so good"? In this first episode of the 4-part Hard Truth Series, Sabrina breaks down why you keep falling in love with who someone could be instead of who they actually are — and why potential is just a placeholder for the grief you're avoiding. She dives into the neuroscience of the "prospective brain," the impact bias that keeps you chasing a fantasy, and the 13-year longitudinal study that explains why you lower your standards for the wrong people but can't appreciate the ones who actually show up. Sabrina gets vulnerable about her own patternsand gives you the exact reframe to stop confusing anxiety with connection. Plus, this week's tool: the Potential vs. Reality Audit, a two-column exercise to see whether you're in a relationship or a fantasy. If you've ever wondered why the available person feels boring or why you keep choosing people who need to become someone else for it to work, this one's for you. If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! ============================= Chapters 00:00 Hard Truth Series Part 1 01:50 Gratitude & Setting Boundaries 04:59 What "I See Potential" Really Means 08:00 The Pattern Is the Real Them 11:08…

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## Transcript

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