# [Update] Putting Yourself First

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-empowered-leader-podcast-7445842/update-putting-yourself-first
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-empowered-leader-podcast-7445842/update-putting-yourself-first.md
Podcast: [The Empowered Leader Podcast](https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-empowered-leader-podcast-7445842)
Published: 2026-07-13T19:58:56+00:00
Episode link: https://substack.iprofessionalcoaching.com/p/update-putting-yourself-first
Audio file: https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/206907496/30f7b230039da0b3340fdb07f58e5c22.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/the-empowered-leader-podcast-7445842/episodes/update-putting-yourself-first
Duration seconds: 300

## Resource

This gets misunderstood quickly. Because the moment you say, “put yourself first,” People hear selfish. It’s not. Putting yourself first is not about ignoring others. It’s about no longer ignoring yourself. And that distinction matters. What It Means Putting yourself first means: * You consider your needs before committing * You make decisions from alignment, not pressure * You stop defaulting to everyone else’s priorities It’s not about choosing you instead of others. It’s about not abandoning yourself while choosing others. What It Is Not * It’s not selfish * It’s not inconsiderate * It’s not “only about you.” If you have to constantly override yourself to maintain relationships, roles, or expectations— You’re not being selfless. You’re being disconnected from yourself. Why This Is Difficult Most people were taught: * to be accommodating * to be available * to be responsible for how others feel So, putting yourself first feels uncomfortable. It can feel like: * guilt * resistance * fear of disappointing others But that discomfort is not wrong. It’s unfamiliar. The Cost of Not Doing It When you don’t put yourself first: * You overextend * You say yes when you mean no * You carry more than you should * You slowly disconnect from your own needs And over time You start showing up depleted, resentful, or unclear. Liberation: Releasing the Guilt You are allowed to consider yourself. Without justification. Without over-explaining. Liberation is the moment you stop asking: “Will this upset someone?” And start asking: “Is this aligned for me?” Visibility: Being Honest About What You Need You begin to recognize: What you actually want What you actually need Where you’ve been overriding yourself No minimizing. No dismissing. Just clarity. Transformation: Choosing Yourself—Consi…

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## Transcript

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