# Negotiation Is Not What You Think | Attia Qureshi and John Richardson

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-art-of-charm-1066744/negotiation-is-not-what-you-think-attia-quresh-and-john-richardson
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-art-of-charm-1066744/negotiation-is-not-what-you-think-attia-quresh-and-john-richardson.md
Podcast: [The Art of Charm](https://stenobird.com/podcast/the-art-of-charm-1066744)
Published: 2026-05-25T07:01:00+00:00
Episode link: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/chrt.fm/track/159B2E/mgln.ai/e/211/traffic.megaphone.fm/TAOC9253097635.mp3?updated=1779080978
Audio file: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/chrt.fm/track/159B2E/mgln.ai/e/211/traffic.megaphone.fm/TAOC9253097635.mp3?updated=1779080978
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/the-art-of-charm-1066744/episodes/negotiation-is-not-what-you-think-attia-quresh-and-john-richardson
Duration seconds: 4052

## Resource

Most people think negotiation is about winning. It’s not. AJ and Johnny sit down with Attia and John to unpack why the best negotiators focus less on control and more on curiosity, relationships, and emotional regulation. From fear of rejection and reciprocity to fairness, empathy, and practicing rejection on purpose, this episode breaks down the real skills behind influence and lasting agreements. They also explore why most people fail negotiations before they even begin — because they haven’t practiced discomfort, clarified what they actually want, or learned how to regulate emotions under pressure. Chapters00:00 – Why negotiation isn’t about defeating people08:00 – FBI negotiation tactics and behavioral training16:00 – Rejection, fear, and building negotiation resilience24:00 – Empathy, reciprocity, and understanding motivations33:00 – Fairness, emotions, and hidden decision making41:00 – Practicing failure and managing stress responses49:00 – Social capital, authenticity, and influence 56:00 – Clarifying what you actually want in negotiation A Word From Our Sponsors Stop being over looked and unlock your X-Factor today at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠unlockyourxfactor.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ The very qualities that make you exceptional in your field are working against you socially. Visit the ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠artofcharm.com/intel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠for a social intelligence assessment and discover exactly what's holding you back. If you’ve put off organizing your finances, Monarch is for you. Use code CHARM at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monarch.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ in your browser for half off your first year. Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince. Upgrade your wardrobe today at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠…

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## Transcript

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