# The Dating Insecurities You Have When You Grew Up Invisible | Black Girl Dating Experience

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/suburban-black-girl-podcast-7091865/the-dating-insecurities-you-have-when-you-grew-up-invisible-black-girl-dating-experience
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/suburban-black-girl-podcast-7091865/the-dating-insecurities-you-have-when-you-grew-up-invisible-black-girl-dating-experience.md
Podcast: [Softly Unfiltered](https://stenobird.com/podcast/suburban-black-girl-podcast-7091865)
Published: 2026-05-27T14:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://rss.com/podcasts/suburbanblackgirlpodcast/2861434
Audio file: https://episodes.captivate.fm/episode/a06a2d78-475b-4427-9d3c-6fee91ef65af.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/suburban-black-girl-podcast-7091865/episodes/the-dating-insecurities-you-have-when-you-grew-up-invisible-black-girl-dating-experience
Duration seconds: 2132

## Resource

In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are getting into something deeply personal and rarely talked about. The dating insecurities that come from growing up invisible. They talk about what happens when you grow up as a Black girl in predominantly white spaces, how not feeling chosen early on shapes your confidence, your standards, and your entire approach to love and dating as an adult. We got into: • How growing up without early romantic attention creates patterns you carry into adult dating • Why Blake and Ashlyn both overperformed to earn love instead of knowing they were worthy just for existing • Why dating is not encouraged for Black girls the way it is for their white counterparts and how that gap shows up later • The painful experience of having parents who called you beautiful but a world outside that invalidated it • Being dared to be asked out as a joke and not even knowing it at the time • Why comparison is the biggest thief and how to protect your timeline when everyone around you seems ahead • What Blake and Ashlyn would tell their younger selves and the message they want every invisible girl to hear Mantra Moment: Growing up invisible doesn't mean you were unworthy. It means the environment didn't reflect your value back to you. If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us one thing you wish someone had told you when you were growing up and feeling unseen. 📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!

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