# Episode 409 - Wanting to Be Desired and Chosen

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/sex-for-saints-714485/episode-409-wanting-to-be-desired-and-chosen
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/sex-for-saints-714485/episode-409-wanting-to-be-desired-and-chosen.md
Podcast: [Sex for Saints](https://stenobird.com/podcast/sex-for-saints-714485)
Published: 2026-02-20T10:00:00+00:00
Episode link: http://amandalouder.com/podcast/409/
Audio file: https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/amandalouder/Episode_409_-_Wanting_to_Be_Desired_and_Chosen.mp3?dest-id=708670
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/sex-for-saints-714485/episodes/episode-409-wanting-to-be-desired-and-chosen
Duration seconds: 2550

## Resource

Have you ever had the experience where your spouse walks past you in the kitchen and doesn't even acknowledge you? Or when it seems like they'd rather scroll on their phone than talk to you? In this episode, I break down what it really means to feel desired in marriage and why being wanted is different from being needed. I explain how desire shows up through thoughts, words, actions, and emotional presence, and how many couples misinterpret or block desire without realizing it. I also walk through common reasons desire fades, including exhaustion, resentment, fear of rejection, and misunderstandings about how desire works differently for men and women. Here is what I want you to hear: desire often grows through small, intentional actions rather than waiting to feel it first. With a practical invitation at the end, this episode is full of real ways to really desire your spouse and have them feel desired again. to shift connection and intimacy.

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## Transcript

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