# 384. You're Not Feeling Guilty. Here's What's Really Going On. Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/relationships-made-easy-1024411/384-you-re-not-feeling-guilty-here-s-what-s-really-going-on Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/relationships-made-easy-1024411/384-you-re-not-feeling-guilty-here-s-what-s-really-going-on.md Podcast: [Relationships Made Easy](https://stenobird.com/podcast/relationships-made-easy-1024411) Published: 2026-05-25T23:00:08+00:00 Episode link: https://abbymedcalf.com/you-dont-feel-guilty Audio file: https://audio4.redcircle.com/episodes/8760cace-d519-4e18-b3a8-0a4a74561536/stream.mp3 Processing state: not_requested JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/relationships-made-easy-1024411/episodes/384-you-re-not-feeling-guilty-here-s-what-s-really-going-on Duration seconds: 1647 ## Resource There's a word people use all the time that’s causing you a lot of unneeded suffering, mostly because you’re using it incorrectly. That word is guilty . You say you feel guilty for canceling plans. Guilty for not calling your mom back sooner. Guilty for wanting more space in your relationship. Guilty for saying no. But the vast majority of the time, what you're calling guilt isn't guilt at all! You've got the wrong label on a very real feeling, and that mislabel is keeping you stuck, second-guessing yourself, and apologizing for things you don't actually owe an apology for. Today, I'm going to tell you what guilt actually is, walk you through the four things people most commonly mistake for guilt, and give you a three-step, concrete process for figuring out what you're really feeling so you can deal with it effectively. Because you can't solve the right problem if you've named it wrong. _________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/you-dont-feel-guilty Download Is It Actually Guilt? A Quick Diagnostic to Name What You're Really Feeling: https:/abbymedcalf.com/is-it-guilt Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack . You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________ Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/ 👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries 👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook 👉 Buy my #1 bestsel… ## Actions - request_transcript: `POST https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/relationships-made-easy-1024411/episodes/384-you-re-not-feeling-guilty-here-s-what-s-really-going-on/transcription-requests` — Idempotently request low-priority transcript generation for this episode. - read_markdown: `GET https://stenobird.com/podcast/relationships-made-easy-1024411/384-you-re-not-feeling-guilty-here-s-what-s-really-going-on.md` — Read the agent-friendly Markdown representation of this episode resource. A page view does not enqueue transcription. Agents should invoke `request_transcript` explicitly when they need this episode processed. ## Transcript Full transcripts are not published on public pages unless there is a clear rights basis.