# When Your Husband Comes Out as Gay: Kelly Foster Lundquist on Her “Beard” Marriage

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/private-parts-unknown-sex-love-around-the-world-220056/when-your-husband-comes-out-as-gay-kelly-foster-lundquist-on-her-beard-marriage
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/private-parts-unknown-sex-love-around-the-world-220056/when-your-husband-comes-out-as-gay-kelly-foster-lundquist-on-her-beard-marriage.md
Podcast: [Private Parts Unknown: Sex & Love Around the World](https://stenobird.com/podcast/private-parts-unknown-sex-love-around-the-world-220056)
Published: 2026-03-18T12:30:00+00:00
Episode link: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/claritaspod.com/measure/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/EDGY2552014044.mp3?updated=1773811791
Audio file: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/claritaspod.com/measure/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/EDGY2552014044.mp3?updated=1773811791
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Duration seconds: 1781

## Resource

Save 10% on your next Fleshlight with promo code 10PRIVATE at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fleshlight.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For the 251st episode of Private Parts Unknown, host Courtney Kocak welcomes author and professor Kelly Foster Lundquist. Kelly’s debut memoir, Beard: A Memoir of a Marriage, unpacks her first marriage to a man who would later come out as gay. Raised in evangelical purity culture, Kelly married young and spent years navigating a relationship shaped by religious expectations and conversion therapy's ripple effects. In this episode, we talk about discovering the reality of her husband’s sexuality in real time, the psychological aftermath of that unraveling, and the challenge of learning to trust herself again. We also get into queer theory as a liberatory framework, the cultural trope of the “beard,” dating and desire after heartbreak, and how writing this book helped Kelly access forgiveness for everyone involved. For more from today's guest, Kelly Foster Lundquist: Buy Kelly's book Beard: A Memoir of a Marriage Follow Kelly on Instagram @kellyfosterlundquist Check out Kelly's website www.kellyfosterlundquist.com Get your copy of Girl Gone Wild from ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bookshop.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Preorder 10 copies of Girl Gone Wild to join The Confessional—a live memoir writing residency during the launch of Girl Gone Wild. For more details, visit ⁠⁠⁠www.courtneykocak.com/teaching⁠⁠⁠. Psst, Courtney has an 0nIyFan$, which is a horny way to support the show: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/cocopeepshow⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Private Parts Unknown is a proud member of the Pleasure Podcast network. This episode is brought to you by: VB Hea…

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