# Quick Spoon: What would your ‘J’ do?

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/people-soup-971297/quick-spoon-what-would-your-j-do
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/people-soup-971297/quick-spoon-what-would-your-j-do.md
Podcast: [People Soup](https://stenobird.com/podcast/people-soup-971297)
Published: 2026-04-09T05:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://peoplesoup.captivate.fm/episode/quick-spoon-what-would-your-j-do
Audio file: https://episodes.captivate.fm/episode/c1215ef3-0768-48e2-9778-030d38c22b15.mp3
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Duration seconds: 166

## Resource

When facing difficult decisions, you can overcome indecision by adopting the perspective of a mentor or role model. This 'J' exercise uses borrowed wisdom to align your actions with your core values.

## Highlights
- Main idea: Use a 'J'—a person who embodies your target values—as a mental proxy for difficult choices
- Practical takeaway: When stuck, ask both 'What would my J do?' and 'What would my J say to me?' to gain clarity
- Failure mode: Relying solely on your own internal monologue during high-stress moments can lead to spiraling or self-doubt
- Core benefit: Borrowing perspective helps bypass personal insecurities and refocuses you on your professional mission
- Implementation: Your 'J' can be anyone from a real-life mentor to a fictional character or a public figure

## Topics

Decision Making, Behavioral Science, Leadership, Values-Based Living, Personal Growth, Mental Models, Role Models, Resilience

## Chapters
- 0:00 — Introduction: Introduction to the Quick Spoon format and the concept of values-based choices.
- 0:20 — The Origin of the 'J' Exercise: A story about a client using a therapist's wisdom to navigate decision points.
- 1:10 — How to Pick Your 'J': Instructions on selecting a mentor, celebrity, or character who embodies your desired values.
- 1:30 — Case Study: Using Oprah as a Compass: How visualizing Oprah Winfrey's response helped overcome the fear of public speaking.
- 2:00 — The Second Level of Perspective: Moving beyond mimicking actions to imagining the supportive advice a mentor would offer.
- 2:20 — Conclusion and Call to Action: Final thoughts on using borrowed perspective and an invitation to share your 'J'.

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## Transcript

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