# 12. Do Our Children Always Know That We Love Them?

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/know-your-children-with-rav-shlomo-katz-7478156/12-do-our-children-always-know-that-we-love-them
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/know-your-children-with-rav-shlomo-katz-7478156/12-do-our-children-always-know-that-we-love-them.md
Podcast: [Know Your Children with Rav Shlomo Katz](https://stenobird.com/podcast/know-your-children-with-rav-shlomo-katz-7478156)
Published: 2026-01-18T10:28:26+00:00
Episode link: https://share.transistor.fm/s/02a9008c
Audio file: https://media.transistor.fm/02a9008c/8179e637.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/know-your-children-with-rav-shlomo-katz-7478156/episodes/12-do-our-children-always-know-that-we-love-them
Duration seconds: 2919

## Resource

Do our kids know we love them… but still not always feel it? Rav Shlomo Katz and the women of Shirat David take on one of the most sensitive (and real) parenting questions: a parent can be full of love — and a child can still experience “You don’t love me.” How does that happen? Building off last week’s foundation (that a parent’s love can’t be “perfect” in the way we wish it could be), we explore: Why a child’s inner world often works in all-or-nothing terms (“If it’s not 100%, it’s nothing”) How “You hate me” is rarely about facts — and almost always about experience The Chassidic idea that inside a “sheker” there can be a spark of truth to redeem (instead of reacting defensively) Why the first move isn’t “fix it” — it’s finding the shoresh (where the feeling is coming from) And we end with a powerful next step for the series: the importance of verbal love — bituy miluli — especially for parents who struggle to express what they deeply feel. A shiur about love, truth, and building a home where children can walk with a real “shield of love”, even when life gets messy. ---------- For more Shuirim and Music from Rav Shlomo Katz, visit: https://ravshlomokatz.com Join Rav Shlomo Katz's WhatsApp Community: https://chat.whatsapp.com/KHKOhhPaeHx5Kb74WL9L9a?mode=ems_copy_t Chapters 00:00 Opening & Sponsorship Acknowledgements 01:26 Today’s Question: Do Children Feel Our Love? 04:39 Three Types of Parental Responses 05:51 Why Kids Don’t Always Experience Love 08:28 Validating Feelings vs Arguing Facts 09:32 What to Do When a Child Says “You Hate Me” 11:15 Find the Source Before Trying to Fix 15:24 The Assumption: The Feeling Isn’t “Factually True” 17:42 The Spark of Truth Inside a Child’s “Sheker” 22:30 Where Real Insight Comes From 23:35 End-of-Life Regrets: Work vs Home…

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