# Choosing Safe Partners: Understanding Red Flags in Dating with Dr. David Wexler

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/it-s-all-your-fault-high-conflict-people-5633630/choosing-safe-partners-understanding-red-flags-in-dating-with-dr-david-wexler
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/it-s-all-your-fault-high-conflict-people-5633630/choosing-safe-partners-understanding-red-flags-in-dating-with-dr-david-wexler.md
Podcast: [It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People](https://stenobird.com/podcast/it-s-all-your-fault-high-conflict-people-5633630)
Published: 2025-11-06T11:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://share.transistor.fm/s/95ffccde
Audio file: https://op3.dev/e/media.transistor.fm/95ffccde/b6823ad6.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/it-s-all-your-fault-high-conflict-people-5633630/episodes/choosing-safe-partners-understanding-red-flags-in-dating-with-dr-david-wexler
Duration seconds: 2758

## Resource

Identifying Red Flags: Making Safer Relationship Choices Dr. David Wexler joins Bill Eddy to discuss his new book "Choose Him Wisely: How to Identify a Safe Partner," co-authored with Dr. Donald Meichenbaum. Drawing from over 40 years of clinical experience working with relationship dynamics and domestic violence, Dr. Wexler shares crucial insights about recognizing concerning patterns early in relationships. Understanding Warning Signs The conversation explores three key categories of warning signs: observed behaviors, historical factors, and gut feelings. Dr. Wexler explains how early relationship behaviors like "love bombing," expressions of contempt, and patterns of entitlement can indicate potential future challenges. The discussion examines why psychological abuse often creates deeper lasting impacts than physical abuse through its systematic erosion of self-esteem and autonomy. Questions Answered in This Episode What are the top three warning signs of potentially abusive relationships? How can someone distinguish between healthy attention and concerning obsession? Why do people sometimes ignore clear warning signs? What role does family history play in relationship patterns? When is couples therapy helpful or potentially harmful? Key Takeaways Early relationship intensity ("love bombing") warrants careful evaluation Expressions of contempt and entitlement serve as significant red flags Personal boundaries and gut feelings provide valid assessment criteria Understanding attachment patterns helps explain relationship choices Self-blame often prevents recognition of concerning behaviors This episode provides valuable tools for anyone navigating dating and relationships, offering practical guidance for evaluating potential partners while maintaining healthy boundari…

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