# 'Stranger Danger' is Bullshit

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/heretic-hereafter-podcast-7475240/stranger-danger-is-bullshit
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/heretic-hereafter-podcast-7475240/stranger-danger-is-bullshit.md
Podcast: [Heretic Hereafter Podcast](https://stenobird.com/podcast/heretic-hereafter-podcast-7475240)
Published: 2026-06-10T11:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://heretichereafter.substack.com/p/stranger-danger-is-bullshit
Audio file: https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/201166055/257a250d67f974a2b6903643d7e36396.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/heretic-hereafter-podcast-7475240/episodes/stranger-danger-is-bullshit
Duration seconds: 509

## Resource

I was out with a group of mom friends recently when the conversation turned to how much we have to schlep our kids around—driving/walking them to school, to sports practice, to lessons and day camps. There was broad consensus that: * we hate it * it feels mandatory as “good moms” AND * we wonder whether our kids could…just maybe…be a little more independent? This last point was uttered cautiously, as if everyone was reading the room, terrified of being judged. And with good reason. All too often maternal suffering feels like a competition; if you’re not having a bad time, you must not be doing enough. And don’t your precious little babies deserve EVERYTHING? Moms are expected to make sacrifices to our careers, personal interests, and even our health in order to ensure that our offspring are protected from every imaginable risk AND maintain dominance in the extracurricular arms race. The end goal of this is… unclear. Harvard, I guess? Some magical career that will guarantee a comfortable, middle-class life with zero upheaval? Heretic Hereafter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Arrested for Leaving Her Kid Alone in a Car Author Kim Brooks knows firsthand the consequences of being judged a “bad mom”—after leaving her preschooler in the car for 5 minutes while she ran into a store, Virginia police put out a warrant for her arrest. This led to a two-year legal tussle, which she admits, could’ve been much worse if she weren’t white and middle-class. At first, Brooks kept her legal problems a secret. She felt weirdly ashamed even as she recognized, logically, that her son had been perfectly safe. It was a cool day; she’d cracked the windows. She could see the car from the checkout counter,…

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## Transcript

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