# Managing Triggering Communications & Reclaiming Your Power During Divorce with Family Mediator & Parenting Coordinator Laura Lorber

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/divorce-happens-6931880/managing-triggering-communications-reclaiming-your-power-during-divorce-with-family-mediator-parenting-coordinator-laura-lorber
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/divorce-happens-6931880/managing-triggering-communications-reclaiming-your-power-during-divorce-with-family-mediator-parenting-coordinator-laura-lorber.md
Podcast: [Divorce Happens](https://stenobird.com/podcast/divorce-happens-6931880)
Published: 2026-07-20T11:15:00+00:00
Episode link: https://www.freshstartsregistry.com/divorce-happens
Audio file: https://episodes.captivate.fm/episode/bd9be869-6567-4667-acd1-5bfce49d2e8e.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/divorce-happens-6931880/episodes/managing-triggering-communications-reclaiming-your-power-during-divorce-with-family-mediator-parenting-coordinator-laura-lorber
Duration seconds: 829

## Resource

You know the feeling before you’ve even read the words. The phone buzzes, you see who it’s from, and your whole body braces — shoulders up, stomach tight, heart already pounding. A text from your co-parent. An email from your attorney dropped into the middle of an ordinary Tuesday. And just like that, the day you were having is gone. In this episode of Divorce Happens , Olivia sits down with Fresh Starts expert Laura Lorber, J.D. — a family mediator and parenting coordinator who has built her entire practice around these exact moments. Laura mediates parenting plans for the Los Angeles courts, is trained in mindfulness and conflict resolution, and is the rare professional who is genuinely comfortable working at the edges of the hardest cases: high-conflict co-parenting, substance use, and past domestic violence. As Olivia puts it, divorce is “ninety-nine percent triggering conversations” — and this is the episode about how to actually survive them. What makes the conversation so disarming is that it is both deeply practical and rooted in real neuroscience. Laura walks through her “seventy-two-hour rule”: a single triggering message floods your system with cortisol, and it can take up to three days before your thinking brain comes fully back online. So why, she asks, would you fire off a reply when the logical part of your brain has literally left the building? Her permission-giving reframe lands like a key turning in a lock — you can respond, “I received your communication and will get back to you by this day, at this time,” fulfill the court order, and set the message down. From there she teaches the tools she gives her own clients for emotional regulation after divorce: siloing every divorce communication into one dedicated email or co-parenting app with notification…

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## Transcript

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