# Why Chasing Approval and Control Is Destroying You

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/breaking-free-from-ocd-anxiety-stress-with-matt-codde-1194100/why-chasing-approval-and-control-is-destroying-you
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/breaking-free-from-ocd-anxiety-stress-with-matt-codde-1194100/why-chasing-approval-and-control-is-destroying-you.md
Podcast: [Breaking Free from OCD, Anxiety & Stress with Matt Codde](https://stenobird.com/podcast/breaking-free-from-ocd-anxiety-stress-with-matt-codde-1194100)
Published: 2026-07-07T22:30:01+00:00
Episode link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/restoredminds/episodes/Why-Chasing-Approval-and-Control-Is-Destroying-You-e3lpbm7
Audio file: https://anchor.fm/s/ef0923c/podcast/play/122514567/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2026-6-7%2F427528100-44100-2-69c1b97802353.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/breaking-free-from-ocd-anxiety-stress-with-matt-codde-1194100/episodes/why-chasing-approval-and-control-is-destroying-you
Duration seconds: 1283

## Resource

Nervous System Hijacked by Approval: Approval Addiction, Chronic Self Abandonment, and Chasing Control In this episode, Matt Codde, LCSW, explores what happens when your nervous system is hijacked by approval and you slowly slip into chronic self abandonment. He breaks down how approval addiction and tolerance for destruction quietly erode your sense of safety, shrink your world, and create the loss of authentic relationships—even while you look like “the good person” on the outside. Matt then turns to control, describing how we end up chasing a phantom called certainty and living in the illusion of playing God. He shows how fear convinces you that control equals safety, while in reality it leads to the erosion of creativity and spontaneity and a growing tolerance for destruction in your relationships, experiences, and everyday life. If you’re stuck in OCD, anxiety, people pleasing, or constant worry about what others think, this conversation will help you see the deeper fear loops behind your symptoms. It’s an invitation to stop abandoning yourself for approval and control, and begin living from authenticity, trust, and genuine connection.🧭 What You’ll Learn in This Episode✅ Understand what it means for your nervous system to be hijacked by approval.✅ Learn how chronic self abandonment develops through people pleasing and self rejection.✅ See why approval addiction leads to a quiet tolerance for destruction in your life.✅ Recognize how chasing a phantom called control keeps you stuck in fear and anxiety.✅ Explore the illusion of playing God and how it blocks trust in something deeper.✅ Discover how fear erodes creativity and spontaneity, shrinking your world.✅ Learn first steps to rebuild authentic relationships without abandoning yourself.🚀 Resources to Help You Heal…

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