# Episode 3 - Sleeping With the Enemy: Symphonie Fantastique and Other Relationship Red Flags

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/better-than-you-remember-7840116/episode-3-sleeping-with-the-enemy-symphonie-fantastique-and-other-relationship-red-flags
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/better-than-you-remember-7840116/episode-3-sleeping-with-the-enemy-symphonie-fantastique-and-other-relationship-red-flags.md
Podcast: [Better Than You Remember](https://stenobird.com/podcast/better-than-you-remember-7840116)
Published: 2026-05-28T16:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://betterthanyouremember.substack.com/p/episode-3-sleeping-with-the-enemy
Audio file: https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/196628496/e9d93c5a0d852157250b9885c4315010.mp3
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Duration seconds: 5155

## Resource

Between the age of nine and twelve, Rebecca probably watched Sleeping With the Enemy – in the theater, at sleepovers, and on basic cable – at least a dozen times (Rebecca's mom had no idea she was shrugging off MPAA guidance and going back to this R rated well again and again). In this big-budget-but-honestly-it’s-really-a-Lifetime-Television-for-Women-joint, Julia Roberts plays Laura, the violently abused wife of Martin (Patrick Bergin) who cleverly fakes her own death and moves to Cedar Falls, Iowa to start a new life, where she also quickly falls for the college drama teacher Ben (Ken Anderson). When Martin – a man whose evil (and mustache) knows no bounds – learns his wife still draws breath, he comes to Iowa to “take what’s his,” and a deadly showdown transpires. Sleeping With the Enemy , while not well received (its current standing is 24% on Rotten Tomatoes ), was a financial win. Why did Rebecca – and young women, primarily – make this film a box office smash? Did watching Julia Roberts get hit, and then hit back, make them feel empowered? Thirty years later, is it just us, or does that new boyfriend Ben seem less thoughtful and more like a love bombing stage five clinger? Jack and Rebecca cue up Hector Berlioz’s Symphonie Fantastique and consider if that 24% is fair or foul. Content consideration: this episode includes adult language and themes of abuse and violence. Get full access to Better Than You Remember at betterthanyouremember.substack.com/subscribe

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