# 136. Do You Even Remember Who You Were Before The World Starting Placing Orders

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/below-the-circle-6619723/136-do-you-even-remember-who-you-were-before-the-world-starting-placing-orders
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/below-the-circle-6619723/136-do-you-even-remember-who-you-were-before-the-world-starting-placing-orders.md
Podcast: [Below The Circle](https://stenobird.com/podcast/below-the-circle-6619723)
Published: 2026-04-22T10:45:00+00:00
Episode link: https://drphyllishayesreams.com
Audio file: https://episodes.captivate.fm/episode/894edc19-efbe-4d68-b592-c589205d327b.mp3
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/below-the-circle-6619723/episodes/136-do-you-even-remember-who-you-were-before-the-world-starting-placing-orders
Duration seconds: 2616

## Resource

What if the woman everyone depends on is not the real you? In this heartfelt episode, Dr. Phyllis speaks to women who have spent years being strong, dependable, and needed, yet feel disconnected from themselves. She explains how constant performance can become a place of safety, while slowly burying your true desires, joy, and identity. Through honest reflection, a personal story, and the truth of Jeremiah 1:5, she reminds listeners that who they are was never meant to be built on what they do. This episode offers a gentle but powerful call to slow down, get still, and begin asking one simple question: What do I actually want right now? Real change begins there, in small moments of honesty, courage, and care. Episode highlights: (0:00) Performance as a safety net (2:32) Simple questions that reveal lost identity (6:26) How women become roles instead of people (9:40) Dr. Phyllis shares her own wake-up moment (15:28) Jeremiah 1:5 and identity before performance (20:36) Small choices that help you reconnect with yourself (24:24) Why this feels uncomfortable (27:53) This week’s practice (29:54) Grief over losing yourself (32:14) Why it is not too late (35:29) Picture your younger self (40:13) Next week’s question about busyness and avoidance Connect with Dr. Phyllis: http://drphyllishayesreams.com/ https://www.instagram.com/drphyllishayesreams/ https://www.facebook.com/phyllis.hayesreams

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## Transcript

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