# 370: Chasing vs. Coasting: Why the Dynamics Change for Both Sexes

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/beat-your-genes-podcast-601101/370-chasing-vs-coasting-why-the-dynamics-change-for-both-sexes
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/beat-your-genes-podcast-601101/370-chasing-vs-coasting-why-the-dynamics-change-for-both-sexes.md
Podcast: [Beat Your Genes Podcast](https://stenobird.com/podcast/beat-your-genes-podcast-601101)
Published: 2025-11-19T19:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://eac5122b-64de-4568-a1e6-e7d246a15c9d.libsyn.com/370-chasing-vs-coasting-why-the-dynamics-change-for-both-sexes
Audio file: https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/eac5122b-64de-4568-a1e6-e7d246a15c9d/BYG_370_audio.mp3?dest-id=3904317
Processing state: not_requested
JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/beat-your-genes-podcast-601101/episodes/370-chasing-vs-coasting-why-the-dynamics-change-for-both-sexes
Duration seconds: 3458

## Resource

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with co-host, Nathan Gershfeld. 0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro 01:51 Q1: Are men destined to hold more power in relationships due to women being the higher investment party? 09:23 What are relationships? 18:08 Are women the only ones who need affirmation & esteem signals? 34:30 What do we need in a relationship? 46:32 The only hope for a dying relationship Q1: Are men destined to hold more power in relationships, aka in a position of power, because women are always the higher investment party? In my experience with a few long-term relationships, the men stopped caring for and investing in my emotional well-being after the initial phase of chasing and courting. They're nice, hardworking, and sincere, but I no longer receive the esteem signals and affirmation that women often need, especially after having kids, since they know I'm not going anywhere. Am I asking for too much? Should I just be happy knowing he's a good provider of resources? X: @BeatYourGenes Web: www.beatyourgenes.org Doug Lisle, PhD www.esteemdynamics.com Nathan Gershfeld, DC www.fastingescape.com Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast

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## Transcript

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