# 269: Why Is Basic Hygiene Such a Battle With My Tween?

Page: https://stenobird.com/podcast/ask-lisa-the-psychology-of-raising-tweens-teens-477102/269-why-is-basic-hygiene-such-a-battle-with-my-tween
Text version: https://stenobird.com/podcast/ask-lisa-the-psychology-of-raising-tweens-teens-477102/269-why-is-basic-hygiene-such-a-battle-with-my-tween.md
Podcast: [Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens](https://stenobird.com/podcast/ask-lisa-the-psychology-of-raising-tweens-teens-477102)
Published: 2026-04-28T07:00:00+00:00
Episode link: https://pdst.fm/e/swap.fm/track/JhoQDAATtO1l0y8tdKNa/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/GTP7045690953.mp3?updated=1776445372
Audio file: https://pdst.fm/e/swap.fm/track/JhoQDAATtO1l0y8tdKNa/pscrb.fm/rss/p/traffic.megaphone.fm/GTP7045690953.mp3?updated=1776445372
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JSON: https://stenobird.com/v1/public/podcasts/ask-lisa-the-psychology-of-raising-tweens-teens-477102/episodes/269-why-is-basic-hygiene-such-a-battle-with-my-tween
Duration seconds: 1822

## Resource

Your tween won't shower, won't change their clothes, or lies about having brushed their teeth or washed their face...Sound familiar? If you're in the middle of a hygiene battle with your tween or young teen, you're not alone, and you're not failing as a parent. This is one of the most common (and confusing) challenges of early adolescence, especially when basic resistance starts to take the form of sneaking or lying. In this episode, clinical psychologist and New York Times bestselling author Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan unpack what's really driving your tween's hygiene resistance, why the lying is probably not what you think it is, and what you can actually do to move things in the right direction without constant conflict. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why tweens suddenly resist hygiene routines they never had to think about before - How puberty and bodily autonomy are at the heart of the power struggle - Why tweens sometimes lie about this - What to say instead of nagging, checking, or trying to force them to change habits - When to let it go, when to hold the line, and when to bring in outside help - How to use habit science to make new hygiene routines actually stick This episode will help you stop spinning in frustration and start responding in ways that protect your relationship, respect your child's growing need for independence, and actually get results.________________ GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠ DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly…

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